This vent is straight from my heart amidst tears.
Day in day out
I wonder what i can do please you
Instead you just complain and complain and complain
You’re never satisfied
You want me to be perfect forgetting i’m only human
I’m only young once
I’m allowed to do certain things
I’m allowed to break boundaries
I’m allowed to try things out
I’m allowed to explore
I’m allowed to be creative
I’m allowed to express myself.
I’m allowed to be imperfect
You’d rather tag me as been mannerless or rebellious
Honestly, along the line i didn’t care anymore
I still don’t.
Over the years the only thing i’ve felt is pure neglect, judgement and misunderstanding.
I’ve never felt this way with anyone else
And it’s affecting me
I can’t even fall in love
And we’re supposed to have the best relationship in the world.
I really don’t know what to say to you
I’ve thought over and over
I’ve lived as decent as possible not because of what you would say or think buh because of God.
Only if you knew.
I was never after your approval
Because i realised early enough
You can’t be pleased
You haven’t influenced my life in anyway.
Just so you know.
The Bible has always been my guideline.
You don’t care about my feelings
You only want your orders to be carried out
In your mind you’re perfect
No one is allowed to counter you.
Honestly,i don’t care
I’ve always tried to talk to you
Really i tried
I tried to develop our relationship
Really i tried
Buh what do i get in return
You don’t even believe i should have a mind of my own.
If you had your way i would be your robot
You would command and order me the way you please.
Hmm buh guess what:
Even under your ”protection”
I’ve grown,i’ve matured
I have a mind of my own
I’m as stubborn as….you can’t even imagine
And honestly,i couldn’t be more proud of myself
And i can’t wait to break-free
Only then will i totally be ME.