How Y’all Doing?!
Uhm…this is more of a rant or ramble so to speak with no particular sequence ( i dunno maybe it might end up arranged or something) and is not directed to anyone. It’s just how i feel.
I think i’m the most misunderstood person in the world. Ok maybe not in the world,in Lagos. *sigh. Maybe not. Whatever. As simple and as straightforward as i am, no one seems to understand my intentions. I’m barely capable of doing evil because as much as i fear the repercussions,i love my life. I try to be really nice to people. Really! And caring too. Yeah i actually am. I love my friends to bits even though i could be more self-centered. Who isn’t?! I don’t have to call or text them everyday to show it. In my heart,i’m praying for them and hoping things turn out well for them. Really. What then is the problem?! From time to time i ask myself. Can’t someone just sit down and understand me and not just assume?! What’s so hard?! Try and study me,talk to me. I’m not a monster. You cannot be absent in my life and then show up one day thinking you’ll meet the same person you left. There’s something called Growing.Up, Maturing. Like they say change is the only constant thing. This i think is one of the many causes of disagreement.
The one and only best friend i’ve had totally became a stranger almost a year ago. Yeah. Towards the end of our friendship,we dated for a couple of months (Totally wrong move) even before that,our relationship had already began deteriorating. I guess we were growing too fast and we couldn’t keep up with each other. LOL. So funny. Even with that i thought he was gonna be my BFF (Best Friend Forever). I even confessed i couldn’t live without him. Hmm. Such Irony. I dunno. I guess we just grew apart. Neither of us took time to understand and acknowledge the people we were becoming. We grew more and more distant. All forms of communication always ended in a fight. I was tired. I missed the old him. He was the only person that understood how much i didn’t enjoy cooking. LOL. He was someone i could call and talk to @ 2am. I wasn’t even bothered about my parents. In all he was the only person that truly understood who the person ‘Ebun’ was. He was basically part of me. Yeah in past tense. How sad. Then we broke up. That was basically the end of our 8yr friendship. Buh i needed to get over him so i cut all forms of contact. And till date we haven’t really talked. The funny thing was we talked about us towards the end buh it was too late you know. We were both done trying.
Right now,i think it’s taking a toll on me. I’m yet to recover even after a year. And i cannot believe it. I always boast of being a superhuman. I can handle almost anything that comes my way. Hmm. Indeed. I think right now i’m yet to find that person that’s ready to actually be a friend. I always say true friendships are the best thing that can happen to anyone. It’s Priceless. And for me it’s a big deal. It’s not something that should be toiled with because even parents as far as i’m concerned can’t give them to you. Really.
So because of that i’ve basically had problems with people around me and i’ve had to endure. Honestly,i miss my best friend. Life was so much easier with him. There’s nothing as blissful as having someone who knows so much about you and accepts you just the way you are. Again it’s Priceless.